Your Hero

Happy Father's Day to all men, whether you are a biological father, stepfather or spiritual father, this message is for you. I am updating this from one of my earlier posts because I think it bears reading again.

Is your dad your hero? Some people may answer  "yes" to this question, but I know some, men especially, who will give an unequivocal "no." It always saddens me when I hear that. My own father, who departed this life when I was just a little girl, was my hero. He taught me to read and spell while he indulged his hobby/part-time occupation -shoemaking. Needless to say, I had shoes to match every dress, and love shoes to this day.

My father also cultivated in me a love for reading and I became a good speller. I enjoyed going places with him, and when I heard his voice in the front yard in the evening, I would leave my mother and run to meet him. She often complained that I loved my father more than I did her, which wasn't true, of course. I was just fascinated with him - his voice, his smile, his jokes. The only bad thing I can recall about my dad is that he left me too soon. Late at night, quite suddenly and without warning. Died of a stroke in his sleep.

So, what about your dad? Is he flawless in your eyes? A man's man? A woman's man? As head of the home, fathers carry a heavy responsibility. They are entrusted with the task of providing, protecting and caring for the home and family. The mother is the one who nurtures, comforts and keeps the home together. However, a real father assumes the mother's role as well. The father who confronts the school bully is the same father who takes his little girl on his lap and reads her a bedtime story. Or tucks her in at night. Or takes her to the doctor when she is ill.

Sadly, some dads do not measure up to the ideal. Some walk out on their families and never look back. Others stay in the home, provide and protect but do little else. We need to pray for these fathers. I think of King David, a mighty man of God, but his track record as a father left a lot to be desired. His son, Amnon, raped his daughter Tamar (2 Samuel 13: 10 - 18) and even though the Bible says David was furious (v 21) he did nothing about it. Absalom, David's other son, had Amnon executed to avenge what he had done to his sister.

Later, Absalom fled from David and they didn't see each other for two years. Eventually, Absalom tried to take the throne from David and to murder him, but Absalom himself was killed. On hearing the news, David wept bitterly. "O my son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! If only I had died instead of you--O Absalom, my son, my son!" (18: 33).

What a sad cry! You may not see your father as your hero, but remember your Father in heaven is faultless. He is perfect and will never fail you. Run to Him and make Him your hero. Happy Father's Day!

Let It Go

4th generation Nissan Maxima (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

1973 Nissan Motor Company (Int'l) (Photo credit: IFHP97)

This weekend I finally bit the bullet, to use a cliche, and bought a car. My old Nissan had been showing signs of old age, and was really begging to be laid to rest. But our relationship spanned thirteen years and three states. She'd never let me down, until recently when I had to take her to the doctor more often than I was comfortable with. As soon as I fixed one thing, something else would go bad. Then last week when she had a convulsion and came to a sudden stop in the middle of afternoon traffic, I finally took notice of  what she'd been trying to tell me.

So on Saturday, I said an almost tearful farewell to my faithful friend. I hope she finds a good home. Have you ever had to say goodbye to something or someone? Or maybe you are holding on, afraid to let go, because he, she or it has become so familiar, so comfortable?


Many times we hold on to people or things that are draining us of our energy and resources and are keeping us from being or having what God has in store for us. What are you holding on to? Friends who are taking you on a downward path? Sinful, destructive habits that put a rift between you and God? A relationship that is not right in God's eyes? Or one that has become so toxic that you are afraid of what might happen if you did let go?

Like I did with my old car, you might be saying, it's not that bad, it satisfies my needs, I don't think I can live without it. I'll hold on a little longer. And the more you say this, the more you deprive yourself of the joy that comes from letting go and letting God take control of your life. 

The enemy feeds you those lies to keep you in bondage. Remember the children of Israel? They had been in bondage for four hundred years and had cried out to the Lord, but when He sent Moses to deliver them, they didn't want to leave. Even after they left, they still murmured and wished they were back in Egypt.  They said to Moses, "Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt?" (Exodus 14: 11).

Paul said, "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,  I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 3: 13 - 14). 

It's time to let go. From my experience with my old car, I know it's not easy.  But you know what you need to let go of. Why not ask God to help you put those things behind you  and press on to the goal He has for you? He will.

What's In Your Ziplock Bag?

In my last post I wrote about overcoming tiredness. I spoke about the busyness that has taken over our modern lifestyle, leaving us tired and irritable. If you did not read this post, you can read it here. Someone may argue that this cannot be helped, that our family, our work, our leisure pursuits all have to be taken care of, and that may be true, but when they begin to encroach on your relationship with God, then there is a problem.

When I first thought of writing this post, I visualized a ziplock bag full of little balls, representing the way we spend our time, each ball with a label, none of them having anything to do with God. There may even be a few ungodly balls.  Such is the life of a person who has allowed himself to be taken over by the things of the world. If you are a follower of Christ, your ziplock bag should contain more godly balls than secular ones.  

As a Christian, your first and utmost responsibility should be nurturing and strengthening your relationship with God. Everything else should take second place.

Jesus said, "He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me" (Matthew 10: 37).

On one occasion when He called a man to come and follow Him and the man asked to be allowed to first go and bury his father, Jesus replied, "Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead"( Matthew 8: 22).

Was Jesus being callous or uncaring? No. He was only trying to teach us how to prioritize our lives. He said, "Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat , or what ye shall drink ; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on . Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?" (Matthew 6 : 25).    

"But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you" (v 33).

In other words, put God first and everything else will fall into place.

 The danger in allowing ourselves to put other things first is that we don't realize when they begin to replace God in our lives. Like weeds in a garden, they can easily overgrow and choke out our godly lifestyle if we are not vigilant. Our family, our work, our interests are all important in themselves, but they should not be allowed to erode God's place in our lives. 

If you find yourself being too busy or too tired to pray, study the word or even go to church, then you are in trouble. Step back and take a critical look inside your ziplock bag today. If it's chock full of things that don't pertain to a godly lifestyle, toss them into the garbage and fill it with the things of God. 

5 Things To Look For In Mr. Right

 

Last week, we focused on qualities that a man would look for in a woman, and we looked at Ruth, a woman who got her man by exemplifying those qualities. Today, in keeping with the theme of love for this month, I want to look at qualities a woman would look for in a man. 

The Bible highlights many mighty men of God who were good husbands and fathers, but nowhere do we get a love story as intense or as fraught with difficulties as the one between Jacob and Rachel. And for that reason I chose Jacob. Yes, I know, his very name means 'trickster', but as we read in the book of Genesis, Jacob proved to be not just a good husband but a man who walked with God.

1.  A man of God. Jacob leaves home as his mother advised him, fearing that his brother Esau would kill him for stealing his birthright. On the first night of his journey, God appears to Jacob in a dream and promises to bless him and his seed. Jacob wakes up the next morning and consecrates that place to God. Later on, we'll see God's guidance and blessings following Jacob throughout his life.

2. A loving man. The next thing he does is kiss Rachel. I don't think this was a romantic kiss. The men of the town had told him that she is the daughter of his uncle, Laban, whom he's come looking for. The Bible says, "And Jacob kissed Rachel, and lifted up his voice, and wept.  And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father's brother, and that he was Rebekah's son:" (Genesis 29 : 11 - 12). It could be that Jacob is overcome with emotion at finding his cousin.

3. A hard-working man. Women love a man who is responsible and hard-working. Jacob certainly proves that when he says to Laban, "I will serve thee seven years for Rachel thy younger daughter" ( v 18). The Bible goes on to say, "And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her" (v 20). When a man truly loves a woman nothing is too much for him to do for her. Jacob is not only hard-working, he is shrewd. When Laban tries to rob him of his wages, Jacob manipulates the livestock, causing him to own more than Laban and increase in wealth.

4. A faithful man. Jacob is faithful to Rachel even though he has children by three other women. This has to be looked at in the cultural norms of the time. It was common for a barren woman to give her maid to her husband in order to have children. Laban tricks Jacob by giving him Leah, his older daughter, instead of Rachel, on his wedding night. This starts a long, agonizing chain of events which Jacob seems unable to break out of.  

5. A committed man.  Eventually Jacob takes his wives and children and leaves Laban's home for good. However, he remains committed to Rachel and Joseph, the son she bore him. When he hears that his brother Esau is coming to meet him, Jacob thinks Esau is about to wreak vengeance on him for stealing his birthright. As Esau and his entourage draw near, Jacob puts Rachel and Joseph at the back of the other wives to spare them from being hurt. 

Ladies, your Mr. Right may not possess all the above qualities, but he should at least demonstrate the first and the last. Without those two, your relationship may be on rocky ground. If you are looking for Mr. Right, ask God to lead you to him.

What Frustrates You?

This is the second post in the series dealing with anger. Anger, as we have seen before is a normal, healthy reaction. Even Jesus became angry, (See John 2 : 15), but the way we express that anger is what really matters. In our normal, everyday life we come across people and situations which, if we are not careful, will frustrate us and lead to anger. Psychologists say that people who have a low frustration tolerance are more likely to have difficulty dealing with their anger.

So, how can you handle frustration in a godly manner?

The first way, of course, would be to pray about it. "Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God" (Philippians 4 : 6). Turn that frustrating situation over to God. It may be something at home, at work, or even at church. Whatever it is, God can teach you how to handle it.

The second thing you can do is look for alternatives. Let's say you are frustrated by your daily commute to and from work. I know a lot of people are. What can you do about it? Can you take a different route? Leave home earlier, or later? Use public transport or car pool?

In some situations, you may have to practice being assertive. If it is a relationship problem, you may have to learn to assert your feelings. This means not allowing yourself to be a doormat, but instead communicating your needs- or frustrations- to the other person without becoming angry. "But speaking the truth in love ..."(Ephesians 4 : 15).

Another thing that may help is regular exercise. This releases endorphins in the brain, which help you feel good and combat the stress and frustration. Just half an hour of walking daily can clear your mind and help you deal with your frustration in a constructive way.

If all of these don't work, you may need to seek counseling. Your frustration and anger may stem from a chemical imbalance in the brain. You may need medication and counseling to help you restructure the way you perceive situations.

What He Means To Me

If someone were to ask you what does Jesus mean to you, what would be your response? I guess you might say something like, He's my Savior. He's my Lord. He came down from heaven, suffered and died on a Roman cross so I could be forgiven of my sins. That's true, but is that all? I mean, that's more than enough, isn't it? To know that you don't have to spend the rest of your life in hell is enough to have you shouting and dancing all day long, so what else is there?

Well, when I think of Jesus, I see more than a Savior. I see a Friend. I see someone I can call up in the middle of the night and say, "Hey, Jesus, I can't sleep. I have this problem on my mind, and there's no one I can talk to about it but You. I tried explaining it to my friend, Jane, but she looked at me with a kind of a blank stare, like she didn't really get it, but you do, don't you, Lord?" Before you know it, you are fast asleep. When you wake up next morning you've forgotten what the problem was.

And the next night. "You know, Lord, I've gotten myself into one sticky mess. I feel like I've been rolled in silly putty. I didn't see it coming, or maybe I didn't think before I said the things I said, and now everyone is talking about me. I might even lose my job. Lord, what am I going to do? Help me, Lord."

A week later. "Lord, I took your advice and did what you told me to do and now everything is cool again, but I have something else to tell you. I met this really cute guy and I really like him. Lord, you should see the shoulders, and when he smiles, well, the sun hides behind a cloud. Oh, I'm sorry, Lord, I didn't mean that. But, anyway, I think he likes me too. Lord, I'm going to let him meet You, okay? And then You'll tell me what you think. Okay, Lord?"

Silly? No. Not when you have a personal relationship with Jesus. He becomes your Friend, Brother, Confidante, Healer, whatever you want Him to be. He's the One you can call upon in the middle of the night because He "neither slumbers nor sleeps". There's nothing too small or too great that you cannot discuss with Him. He hears, He understands and He makes interecession for us with the Father. Won't you call on Him today, or tonight? He will listen, and He will answer. He said, "Henceforth I call you not servants ... but I have called you frends" (John 15:15).

Where Are You?

This morning I woke up around five o'clock and had some difficulty going back to sleep. It was much too early to wake up on a Saturday morning, especially the last one before Daylight Saving Time. But as I lay there, this scripture came to my mind: "And the Lord God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where art thou?" (Genesis 3:9). A strange thought at that hour of the morning. I knew where I was. In my warm, cozy bed, but immediately I understood what the Holy Spirit was saying to me.

The past month had been a busy one at work. That, plus the unusually cold days, seemed to have taken a toll on my no-longer-young body. I wasn't praying as I would have liked to. Oh, I still prayed, but my prayers were sketchy, half-sleepy mumblings at nights and even less so in the morning. And God was saying to me, "Where are you? I want to speak to you. I want to commune with you and have fellowship with you. I want to wrap my arms around you and comfort you and ease your burdens, if you will let me."

I turned over in bed and said, "Lord, I'm sorry. Forgive me for being so busy that I do not have time for you." Right there and then I became wide awake and I began to pour out my heart to God as I hadn't done in a long time. I spoke, I listened and He spoke back to me. It was a beautiful moment of interaction with my Heavenly Father, and when it was over I felt relieved, refreshed and restored. Before I knew it, I was fast asleep.

Prayer has been on my mind a lot lately, and I believe that was the reason the Holy Spirit dropped that verse into my spirit. When He asked Adam so many years ago "Where art thou?" it wasn't because He didn't know where he was. He wasn't playing hide-and-seek with Adam. God sees us at all times, but in effect He was saying to Adam, "Where are you in your relationship with me? Why are you hiding from me? Why don't you run to greet me the way you always do?"

He said it to me this morning, and He may be saying the same thing to you. Listen. If you hear Him calling you, don't hide. Run to Him. He won't hurt you. He says, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart" (Jeremiah 29: 11-13).